Thuggin'

Man, the titles of these things are getting pretty stupid, no? Whatever, it all about content right? I like to think of this blog as the written equivalent of a Dillinger Four record. A bunch of stupid ass names, but once you give it a listen, it is amazing, and you learn to love the stupid names, and even find yourself using them yourself (As I have in this blog, as well as songs I have written). Anyway, how is everyone doing? Having a good Wednesday? That's nice, we should have a beer and talk about it.

Aside from finally feeling like a human being again after this weekends drink-a-thon, today is your average day. I have a bunch of billing paperwork to do, so that is keeping me busy, which will make the day just float right on by, and before I know it, it'll be Thursday. I'm actually writing this out of complete boredom right now, because I'm waiting on a bunch of people in the office to get back to me. I don't really have a ton to talk about today, so lets think of a topic I can rant about for a while.

People who shit on Canada

Really? People like you are still around? I've been to Montreal, so I haven't seen much of Canada, but I must say, Montreal fucking rocked. They have awesome food, good beer, fun people, and the strip clubs are WAY fucking cooler than the ones in the states. I cant believe people still have a love of shitting all over Canada just because they say EH. Also, Canada has some great bands. If you have never listened to The Fullblast (r.i.p), you are missing out on some outstatnding punk rock from our neighbors to the north. Other great Canadian include, Propagandhi, Haymaker, The Planetsmashers, and The Real McKenzies. So, get over yourself, put down the Hateraid, and learn to love our friends to the North. Oh yeah, and they have awesome hockey teams. Sure you can't get drugs past customs that easy, but hey, Canada has better weed than America too, so, there you go.

Well, that's about it, I should really get back to work and finish up the day. I'm going to fire up a fresh pot of coffee and get to work. Later bitches. Viva la Canada

No More Beer.

You know, they should really start naming holidays correctly. Memorial Day? Really guys? They should change it to, "Get as fucked up as humanly possible and grill meats" Day, because that's what everyone does all weekend. Well, that's what I did all weekend, and you know what, it was great. Anytime you get more than 2 days off of work in a row is a great weekend for me though. I don't hate my job, but I would much rather be drinking by and sitting in the sun, then sitting at this damn desk, doing work. Anyway, back to the point at hand. I think I did something weird to my gut, because I have felt like SHIT all day. My stomach has been a mess, I'm not hungry, and I just feel like crap. It could probably have something to do with the 14 gallons of alcohol I consumed over this 3 day weekend, but hey, I had a fucking blast, so who cares right?

Some how we made it the entire weekend without any real rain, and all parties I was invited to went on as planned. These parties covered a good amount of lower New York, from upstate to Queens and back. Good times were had by all, I got tanked every night, and ended up playing beer pong for way to long. That game is fun, but man, around game 10 on any given night, I'm either to drunk to hit a shot, or just too fucking lazy to want to stand in front of that table any longer. I'm a people person, and I like to hangout at parties and shot the shit, but once you get locked into playing beer pong, you are just stuck talking to you partner, and talking shit to the other 2 people at the opposite end of the game.

As much fun as the weekend was, I woke up today kind of pissed I had to go back to work. I mean, come on, maybe I should just jump on the unemployment bandwagon my friends are on, and just fucking be awesome all day in the sun. Sounds like a plan to me, eh? But yeah, another week, shouldn't be too bad. We are playing a show on Friday night, a nice local gig, which is nice, because I haven't seen a lot of friends in a while, so it'll be a good show to get some practice in, see my friends, and probably have a few cocktails in between. There is also a party afterwards, in which I will probably have a few more cocktails, and end up passing out on someones living room/bedroom/bathroom floor. It isn't the best place, but sometimes you just have to take what you're given. Besides that, this week looks pretty normal, apparently I have to start working on my house again, starting with painting the porch, fuck. I don't mind helping out around the house, but some things are just a pain in the ass, and painting while still mildy hungover is one of them. Hopefully I can con my way out of doing anything today, go home, and just lay down for a little bit and get my head together. Today was pretty busy in the office while hungover, so I need to just turn my brain off for a while.

That's about it, have a great weekend everyone, I know I will, and come see Cloud 9 on Friday. I promise I will get drunk and tell some funny jokes. Later.

Brett Weir I Said!

Yup, it is Tuesday. Everyone having fun? I sure am. If you read yesterday's post, you know that I was suffering from a massive case of wet brain. Today I am happy to announce I have kicked it, and can once again think like a human being (or as much as I could think before the weekend). With that in mind, this coming weekend is Memorial Day, which means a 3 and a half day weekend from work, which will no doubt lead to more wet brain. Who knows, maybe I'll have another case tomorrow, being that tonight is $2 pint night at my favorite drinking establishment. Dollar tacos and $2 beers? Can't beat that with a 4 foot dick. Go ahead and try.

Although the taste of cheap tacos and beers would be amazing tonight, I might also just hang loose and play some guitar. I have been very lazy with that in the past few weeks, and it kind of bums me out when I realize I haven't done anything creative in a while. I mean, my band goes out and plays all the time, but we play songs we already know, so to write new songs is always fun for me. I'm still trying to figure out how to write a good song for my band. Before this, I spent 6 years playing in punk bands, and writing music, which I thought was damn good. Playing in a hip-hop/rock band has had a large effect on my ability to write music. To be honest, I don't know how the hell to write a song for this band. I mean, anyone can fart around on a few chords and let Doug and Tags go off on a crazy lyrical flow, but to actually write a good song, music wise, takes a little something different for this band, which I feel I really haven't gotten a hold of yet. Although like I said before, I've been so lazy with playing my guitar and giving it a shot, I'm not surprised I haven't come up with anything in a long time. Oh well, back to the drawing board this week to sir something up I hope.

Aside from being a lazy ass musician, things are looking good. I purchased and inflatable beer pong table that you can use in the pool, and it is also starting to get really nice out in New York, so hopefully I will have use for this amazing purchase very soon. There is something about drinking and swimming that has always had a special place in my heart. I'm a sweaty guy, so if I can enjoy beers somewhere that I will never sweat, I'm all about it. So to anyone out there with a pool, call me up, I'll come over and hang out, and bring the table! I'm laying out a challenge to anyone with a pool and the skills. Lets get drunk and almost drown, it'll be a blast. Also now that it is summer, I've had the itch to get a new tattoo for a while, or at least finish the one on my arm that I have also been lazy about figuring out. The band is playing this all day show/car show/tattoo shop thing this summer, and I have said I'm going to show up and get a tattoo that day. Hopefully they have something awesome I like, so I don't look like I just talked a whole bunch of shit about getting one, then backing up, which there is a large possibility of happening.

Oh well, we shall see. If all goes well, I will be a well-tattooed, creative, drunk-in-a-pool musician by summers end, if not, I'll just be the same guy I am right now, which hey, ain't so bad. I'm going to go finish this cup of coffee, listeng to some Gaslight Anthem, and go the fuck home.

Oh yeah, and my friend told me to look up something called "shake that bear" on the net. All I can say is, what the FUCK man.

Pissing on your front door

Another one in the books. I'm writing this pretty late tonight because honestly, my entire day was spent sitting at work, trying to clear up some issues, and trying to defeat my wet-brain. For those of you who don't know, wet-brain is when you spend multiple days doing nothing but drinking, then are forced to face reality come Sunday, and stop drinking. This creates wet-brain, a kind of prolonged hangover in which you aren't really in pain, but everything going on upstairs is a little slower, and things are just generally too much to think about. Not the best thing to have on a busy Monday morning at work, but hey, that's life.

Plattsburgh was awesome as usual. I got yelled at by a group of girls on Friday night for taking a leak in the entrance hall to their apartment building. While I understand it could be considered kind of gross, I feel they kind of over reacted. I mean, you go to college, catching a guy taking a piss is the WORST thing you have seen? Damn guys, get out there and live a little. But yeah, they were kind of pissed, but I smoothed things over with some quick talking, and a hot dog I bought for one of them. Saturday night we played our show at The Green Room, and had a little shin-dig at the apartment we were staying at. To be completely honest I don't really remember much of the party, but I'm sure it was a good time. I woke up with a beer can in my ass, so I'm sure that is a good indication everyone had a great time the night before. Sunday we packed up our gear and headed home, and like usual, I felt a sense of sadness. The weekends away with the band are some of the most fun I have e ver had, and every weekend when everything is wrapped up, I can't help but feel that I am really going to be bored for the next week or so until the next show. But I guess that's life, huh?

Be that as it may, Plattsburgh was a great time, and I feel good knowing that we are headed back there in about a month to lay two shows in a row, so I'm sure it will only double the amazingness. This week looks to be a good one to get back on track with life though. Get back to the gym, enjoy the nice weather that is coming, get some work done around the house, and hopefully stop being lazy after work and start writing songs again. I really haven't felt like playing guitar much in the last few weeks, but after this weekend that has changed.

This weekend is Memorial Day, which means I get an extra long weekend, which will probably lead to another case of wet-brain comes Monday, but atleast I won't have to work, and I will be able to handle it properly, which involves sleeping in, drinking coffee, and laying around the house. Sound like a plan? Good. See you bitches on the flip side.

Humpty Hump Day

Seriously, The Humpty Dance is probably one of the best songs of the 20th century. Just saying...

Aside from my love of Digital Underground songs, I must say that Wednesday is one of the best days of the week for me. While you have really only made it through half of your week, it is the first day in which you can catch a glimmer of the weekend that is to come. Monday always sucks, you catch up on crap that happened over the weekend, you are usually hungover, cranky, pissy, tired, you know the drill. Tuesday sucks ALMOST as much as Monday, because you usually still have all the same symptoms of Monday, minus the hangover (unless you had a REALLY bad Monday, and went out boozing). Wednesday though, is usually the time in the week when I start feeling good, getting motivated for another weekend, and feeling better about the week in general. You've made it half way, and it is all down hill from here! Also, in many of the bars around my neck of the woods, Wednesday is wing night, which is always a plus, no matter where you are.

My reason for feeling so up beat about this week is the weekend to come. After some time off, my band is playing this weekend, which always makes the week go by a little quick. We are heading up to Plattsburgh, NY. Now, for those of you who don't know, Plattsburgh is your run-of-the-mill upstate New York college town. Lots of people, lots of bars, tons of drunken hormones, which of course makes for an awesome time. On top of all that, it is graduation weekend for a lot of colleges, including Plattsburgh. Which means piled on top of all the normal raging that goes on, no a soul in town has anything responsible to do. Last time we played up in Plattsburgh, it was the middle of the semester, and it was a pretty crazy time, so I can only imagine when a weekend in town during graduation will be like. Also, Plattsburgh has the best coffee ever. I don't know if you guys are fans of coffee, but I am, and when I talked into this coffee shop in town, and the guy behind the counter recommended the blueberry infused coffee, I feel in love. I think I'm going back down there to make a sizable purchase of the beans to bring home. I know that you can probably get this shit anywhere, but if I'm in town, what the hell, he's a cool guy, I'll help out his little shop.

All this talk of coffee, booze and hormones got me all flustered, I think I'm going to go. Got another hour before I can sneak out of here for lunch and go to the gym. It is a nice day out, so hopefully I can get outside and go for a run. Working off beer calories is harder than I thought it would be. Later.

Balls deep in a thin jar

Friday, bitches, friday. It is 9am in the great state of New York and I'm sitting at work, enjoying my morning coffee, and thinking about the weekend that is to come. I'm a little excited because this weekend is one of those special weekends where my band has nothing to do, so I get to have the whole weekend to myself, I almost don't know what to do! Actually that's a lie, I'm going to drink with my buddies and tell dirty jokes, God Bless America. I believe I'm catching drinks tonight with my buddy who I haven't seen in a years. He moved to North Carolina for college and stayed down there for a while, but now he's back in down, which is pretty sweet. Hanging out with old friends is always weird, because lets face it, people are a whole lot different after college. I always have this fear for running into my old friends, and seeing they have turned into dicks.

Being that I have the weekend off from the band, I think I'll take this time to go hang out in the city also. My friend invited me to some big ass block party. The flyer says Free Beer, so I have to go and at least check it out. I mean, if there isn't free beer, I will be kind of bummed, but I'm sure it will stilll be fun. A skatepark, BBQ, beers, music and more beer, sounds like a good way to spend a sunny Saturday afternoon in my book.

Well, that's about it, not much going on. Happy Friday bitches, have one on me tonight.

Cinco De Hold The Mayo

Hey guess what? It is still raining...fuck.

Happy Cinco De Mayo! Ugh, wait a second, I'm not Mexican. Does this work the same as St. Patricks Day? Can I be Mexican for the day? That'd be pretty awesome. Well yes, today is the 5th fo May, and yes, it is another drinking holiday in America. I love these drinking holidays, they give people great reasons to go out and get super intoxicated on a Tuesday, without feeling like a drunk, and hey, I'm all for it. I just hate how some people try and pull pride into the day. I mean, listen, I'm party irish, and yes, I like drinking on St. Patricks Day, but when you get way to into your background on these "holidays" you are just another douche bag. If you are from fucking New Jersey, St. Patricks Day does not make you any more Irish one day a year, you are still just another Jersey mook. ANYWAY, today is Cinco De Mayo, which people usually think is some great holiday. In reality May 5th is not Mexico's independence day, that is September 16th (yeah, I read about holidays to dig out what people should actually be celebrating). May 5th was the day that the Mexican army won a huge battle against the French forces, and hey, I think that is cause for celebration anyway! Fucking Frenchy's.

Either way, I'm going out after work for a drink with my good friend Mike. I mean, I'm probably the furthest thing from Mexican, but they have $2 beers all night, and I'm not one to miss a deal. Also the Yanks are playing Boston and tonight, maybe they can pull a win out of their ass. That would only make my night of Tequila drinking better. I also find it pretty funny that I will soon be in a bar, full of people with Mexican garb on, drinking Corona, and shooting Tequila, while it is dark, shitty, and rainy outside. God Bless New York and it's year round amazing weather.

Besides all the Mexican jazz tonight, nothing else is going on. It is going to be a slow week at work, so I will probably do more typing on this thing as usual while I wait out my days for the weekend which I will hopefully get to go out and see some friends I haven't seen in a long time, and also take my mother out, being that Sunday is Mothers day. If you aren't taking your Mom out, or at least getting her something some-what nice, you are a dick. Come on folks, she walked around with you in her gut for 9 month, you ruined her figure, and pissed away tons of her money over the years. The least your selfish ass could do is get some flowers and maybe take her out to eat. Luckily, my mom is as large of a Mexican food fan as I am, so I'm taking her out for lunch and drinks at our favorite Mexican spot, the going to see Wolverine. I want to see it because I am a comic book dork at heart, and she wants to see it because she thinks Hugh Jackman is just dreamy, and watches to see the scene when he jumps out of the tank, all naked and wet (yeah, should be a great movie experience).

Alas, it is only Tuesday. Three more days to go before I can even think about drinking with my buddies, eating tacos, or seeing naked wet men (unless I play my cards right before Sunday afternoon). I'm going to go wander the office for the rest of the day then go out my day of being Mexican. Live La Drink-A!

I'm Fatally Yours

Another Monday! I wish I could say it was a beautiful one, with birds chirping and the sun shining, but it is actually shitty, rainy, and kind of dark out. I think this shitty weather followed me home from Connecticut because it rained the whole drive home, and hasn't really stopped since. While in the great state of Connecticut I took in a show by the band Alkaline Trio. For those of you who don't know this wonderful band, they hail from the windy city of Chicago and sing songs about alcohol, death, lost love, and all other kinds of sunny subjects! I must say after all these years, they still put on a good show, and I was happy to finally see them live.

So, aside from the Alkaline Trio show Saturday night, I found out that there isn't a ton to do in New Haven, CT. My girlfriend and I walked around most of Saturday afternoon going into all the shops and stores just burning time. We also went to a brewery/pizza place that was pretty awesome. I am a fan of home made food and beers, so this place was perfect. What was extra funny was that during the concert and afterwards, my girlfriend was going 1-for-1 with me on beers. Anytime I'd go up to get a drink from the bar, she requested one also. Why this is funny is that I am a 215 pound guy who drinks on a some what regular basis, and she, is a 100 pound-soaking-wet girl who does not drink very often. So by the 4th or 5th drink, she had almost had her fill. We sat down at the place to eat and order some drinks while she drunken belittled people around the bar, as well as people who came up in conversation. That part was just special because for those of you who know my girlfriend, she is normally a very quiet person. So to watch her drunken slander people is something special.

All in all it was a really fun weekend away with the lady, but as I said before, I seem to have brought this shitty weather back from CT with me. Oh well, can't win'em all I guess. I guess I should go and attempt to get some work done while I'm at work, instead of writing about shit I did when I wasn't at work. DO WORK. Later.